The first episode of Geordie Shore In Greece was even more mortal and mental than we expected.

As usual the Geordies came up with some MINT one liners, so sit back and enjoy our selection of the 15 most outrageous quotes.

WARNING: Do not read this article if you're easily offended!

#1 Scott on the lads' bedroom having a pool table...

"This is perfect 'cos it gives Kyle and Gaz something to do while they're talking about their birds and their f***ing feelings."

#2 Holly on Chloe's promise not to have sex with Scott...

"Good luck with that one Chloe.You may as well get yer pyjamas in the shag pad now!"

#3 Marnie on Scott and Chloe's flirting...

"Scott is already trying to work his charm. That wouldn't work with me but I can practically see Chloe's fanny fluttering."

4. Scott on Holly's angry outburst...

"The girl's like a wild animal, screaming like a pig getting w***ed off. Kyle! Kyle!"

5. Scott on the first night out...

"So far Greece has been pure mint. If getting pi**ed and destroying this villa is our job for the summer, Anna couldn't have picked a better crew. So I'd happily volunteer for overtime."

6. Nathan on sunbathing...

"The sun's out and it's boiling. I'm gonna go from a milky latte to a triple espresso chocolate cappucino. Drink me!"

7. Aaron on teaching Chloe to swim...

"Scott won't leave us alone. He thinks he's the best at everything. I think that he's just jealous that I'm touching his bird."

8. Chloe on her swimming lesson...

"Aaron and Scott are getting quite competitive over us. I only wanna learn to swim. I'm gonna have no arms left soon!"

9. Charlotte on the watermelon eating game...

"Gary is full-on licking us out here, he's goin' for gold."

10. And on being friends with Gary...

"Maybe we can start going for poos in front of each other now?"

11. Chloe recruiting the girls for "nipple watch"...

"My nipples have got a mind of their own. It's alright if the left one comes out because it's pure lush, but if the right one comes out... no no!"

12. Gary on Scott and Aaron flirting with Marnie...

"Even though Marnie's got a boyfriend Scott and Aaron are still trying to graft her. It's like dangling a carrot in front of two donkeys."

13. Charlotte on the yoghurt fight...

"Aaron's covering us in all this white stuff but I'll let him off, I think that's the only time he'll get to do that to a girl this holiday."

14. And on Gary again...

"Me and Gary will always have each others' backs, even when we're old and wrinkly. I'll help him take his viagra and he'll help me change me p**s bag."

15. Holly after her and Kyle's bedroom antics...

"I got c*m on me chin." That's just lovely then.

'The next brand new episode of Geordie Shore is on Tuesday at 10pm on MTV'.